Why We Call Our Blog the Miracle of More

The miracle is a beautiful image of Ephesians 3:20--more than I can ask or imagine. Every day is a miracle. Every moment is a miracle. Specifically for our family, the miracle of more is our family growing in ways I would never have imagined when we first committed to adoption 8 years ago. But, the greatest miracle is the change in ME!

If you have questions about adoption, our work in South Africa, or spina bifida, please email me at rbmattox@bellsouth.net

Thursday, July 2, 2009

In Search of His Past---Our Family's Journey

Many of you know that this week was to be a journey like none other. We had made plans for Brandon to meet his biological father for the first time. If you've missed this story, you can begin reading about it by clicking here.
That's the first of several posts about how this journey began and progressed---all of which I need to be reminded was orchestrated by our Heavenly Father who loves Brandon more than I do. There are several more posts about the events that have led up to our meeting you might find intriguing.

We left on Tuesday, a journey of 3 days to meet the Father. There were some raw emotional moments on the way, some hilarious laughter, and just some plain fun.




Since we were on our way to Michigan, Brandon decided he would like to travel through the town he lived in when his mother was still living. In the process of looking for his address when he was six years old, I made contact with a close friend of his mother's. She wanted to see Brandon again, and had some things to share with him.



We were most surprised to learn that this friend had his mother's ashes that we supposed to be scattered in the Atlantic Ocean. While Brandon had shared with me that he wasn't interested in being given the ashes, I told both Brandon and Lynda I thought I would take them in case Brandon, at some time, decided he would like to scatter them in the ocean himself.

Brandon, later, got in the car with Lynda to drive to his old neighborhood. As if this trip itself was not awkward enough, when he got in her car, she said, "Oh, you can sit by your mom." What?? Brandon was in the back seat of Lynda's car texting Caleb who was also in the back seat of Lynda's car...."This is really awkward." And, later that night, he said, "You can tell ALL of your bloggy friends that THAT was the most awkward experience of my life."

We drove through Brandon's old neighborhood, to his old school, and past his old church. When it was time to say "Goodbye," Lynda began to cry. She really must have loved Bonnie. We left with Bonnie's ashes...that Brandon now refers to as The Package, and some photos of his mom.

The next day we left for Michigan where Brandon would finally meet his dad, Tom.

Here's a photo of Caleb and Brandon with Tom..........

Okay, I'm teasing.....just the boys way of livening things up today.

After much prayer and thought, I chose the Henry Ford Museum for our meeting place. I decided it might be better to have something to look at and talk about, other than just sitting down with someone who felt like a total stranger and trying to find something to talk about. The girls seemed to enjoy it, too!




Our first hour there, I had begun to think I had made the wrong decision. The 2 of them, Brandon and Tom hardly spoke to one another after their initial meeting. More often than not, they walked in different directions, looking at different exhibits. I silently prayed to find some way to help them make conversation.

We decided to eat lunch, and that proved to finally be a time for some conversation. I was glad to hear them talking, and Caleb was good at keeping the conversation going.

Our journey began with the end in mind. Near the last of our tour of the Henry Ford Museum, we finally took a photo of the two of them.


I'm not sure what I had expected. I suppose, being a mama, I had hoped for more of an emotional connection. Perhaps that it to come. Perhaps, today's visit was just an effort for both the son and the dad to make peace with their past. Whatever comes of it, I will forever be grateful to my Jesus for allowing me to be a part of this day.

I am emotionally drained now, and have much more processing to do. I pray that Brandon will have more to say about his feelings concerning this day. I pray that Tom will indeed stay in touch with Brandon as he said he would before we parted today. His last words to me, "Thank you for making all of this possible."

My last words, "Thank you, all of you, for your prayers. The day was much more preacful than I thought it might be. Thank you, Jesus, for making all of this possible."

7 comments:

Kim K. said...

Wow. What a journey. Thank you for sharing. My prayers continue to be with your family. You've had quite the rollercoaster of emotions on this trip. (((hugs)))

Did you pack warm enough clothes for MI? Brrrrr...

Sarah said...

I've been really sporadic in the blogosphere lately...didn't know about your trip. Glad it went well, but I'd be drained too.

You can tell Brandon that this bloggy friend would have found that situation with the ashes incredibly awkward, too.

samuelsadoption said...

So glad the trip was a success, if you can measure it that way. Be safe coming home.
Amy

Sabrina said...

I think that even if Brandon isn't showing that he's processing, he is. How could he not? Now he has much to think about. And, for the record, as much as I think B looks like his mother, he looks equally as much like his father!

Heather said...

What a journey you all have had. I will say that the visit sounds about right. Each person checking the other out to think is this really, really? That sound about how my first meeting went too. It was a little awkward, a little cool and too much to take in at one time!! Praying that they can keep things on an even level and really get to know each other.

Jensboys said...

So glad to read about it ... :) Thanks for sharing!

Mr.Mom said...

I told you about my situation. I am glad that Brandon got to meet his father in better conditions than when I met mine and I pray that they will stay in touch. They are a part of each other and need each other more than they might know.

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