Why We Call Our Blog the Miracle of More

The miracle is a beautiful image of Ephesians 3:20--more than I can ask or imagine. Every day is a miracle. Every moment is a miracle. Specifically for our family, the miracle of more is our family growing in ways I would never have imagined when we first committed to adoption 8 years ago. But, the greatest miracle is the change in ME!

If you have questions about adoption, our work in South Africa, or spina bifida, please email me at rbmattox@bellsouth.net

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Gotcha Day--Gladness and Mourning

And, if that doesn't make sense to you, I will explain.

I expected tears and tantrums from Zeke. He is older. He has been less prepared for our arrival. We have yet to see any of those things, and that worries me some. I wonder if he had a "healthy" attachment to anyone at his orphanage.

Today, Drew joined his Forever Family.

When we arrived at the civil affairs office, he was standing at the glass door waiting on us, so I don't have an offical photograph of that "first" moment.

He seemed glad to see us, insisted on giving us each a piece of candy: one to me, Stan, Ellie, Josie-Tatum, and QingZhuang.

It wasn't longing and he was playing. Then the polished tile floors and marble walls began to echo with the shouts and laughter of four Mattox children. It was musical.

When Zhuang Zhuang (Drew) said he had to niao niao, Baba took him to the toilet. His nanny Tina Ayi shouted good-bye to him and made a quick, uneventful get-away.

All was well until Zhuang Zhuang came out of the restroom and Tina Ayi was not there. That's when the tears began. While I was completing paper work and signing offical legal documents, Baba was in the midst of emotional breakdown--both his and Zhuang Zhuangs. He had to chase him as he ran to the door and tried to run outside, looking for his ayi.

He finally resigned himself to quietly sobbing in Baba's lap.

We left the Civil Affairs office and headed to Wal-Mart (more on that in another post.) The three in the back seat were happy campers.

And the little one with Mama and Baba mourned until he fell asleep.

His spirits improved when he was allowed to choose his own snacks at the ever-beloved department store--the place we all love and despise.

Once back at the hotel, he gradually began to enjoy himself.

Until all of the children grew sleepy. They all surpised me by taking naps...without being asked. When Josie-Tatum feel asleep, Zeke crawled into bed with her.

Except Zhuang Zhuang. He didn't take a nap. He cried. He continued to cry. We went to supper. He was happy--to put on his jacket. He put his backpack on. We were pretty certain he thought he was going home.

At dinner, he sat somberly..until the food arrived.

Btu, when he finished eating, he was back to mourning. He sadly repeated the same phrase over and over again, with two words in particular. It sounded somthing like hui jiao. And, I had no idea what that was. We finally asked one of the waiters who spoke some English to help us. That's when we learned that over and over again he was telling us, "I want to go home." Once I heard him use the word for China.

We left the restaurant, and he seemed to feel a little better...until we stepped off the elevator and he realized we were back where we began. That's when the screaming began.

Stan decided to keep him in their hotel room, while I brought Qing Zhuang and the girls to our room. So...I don't really know how things are going now. I had Josie-Tatum step to the door, and she know longer heard the crying, just the television.

So, today, please pray for our youngest son. His heart is so heavy. He has no idea what lies ahead. He only knows he was loved, happy, and secure in his foster home.

Pray for Mama, and especially for Baba as he tries to comfort him.

But, for now, I must go referee an argument between three Chinese children....loud as ever, hoping the management doesn't come tell us to hush!!!


Anonymous said...

Oh Robbie,

My heart is aching for little Drew. I know it is hard for him, and you, to see him grieve. I'm sure each day will get better. We both know Amazing Hands kids are truly loved, and that is wonderful. Gods Blessings on your family as you go through this adjustment time. Cameron loves the pictures!

Colleen Hall

Amy said...

prayers sister...

Marsha said...

Well, it makes sense when a kid has such a wonderful home and knows he is so loved. You know he will soon fiercely love you as much. Guess it was a little easier for Annagrace in that she had to say goodbye to Ai Tina at the orphanage, so when she got to Zhengzhou WE were the ones she knew. And yet nap and night time for at least 2 days---gut wrenching sobs till she fell asleep. I was emotionally EXHAUSTED. This too shall pass Robbie and fam! May not be easy--but will pass. And you know he needed you as his mommy and baba. Hoping to hear happier reports within a week!

Jolene said...

I am so sorry to hear that he is so heartbroken. I am praying for his sweet little heart!

Anonymous said...

I am praying for you all, Robbie!!! The boys are both darling.

Susan Elkins

Steve & Kate said...

Drew is so cute! His grieving sounds like our daughter's just last week. For the first four days she would crumble when we turned the corner to our hotel room, realizing she wasn't going back to her CWI, but back to "prison". Now, only a week later, she is a fun-loving, happy, yet demanding little girl.


Amy said...

May he soon feel the unending love of his forever family...soon the mourning will turn to joy!

Aus said...

Praying for you guys! Sounds much like our youngest - from foster home back to SWI to us in a couple weeks time - and he too mourned hard. During the first night he rubbed his head on Mama's shirt so hard and so long that he ended up with scratches from the button on her shirt and she with a bruise. But after a day or two the love won and he "turned the corner". We still have contact with his FF today - and it's all good.

hang tough - time is all it takes!

hugs - aus and co.

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